when i was young, i used to believe that the only way to serve God is to become a full-time church worker. somehow it didn't work out that not all christians are full-time church workers. when i was about 16 (maybe) , i learnt that it doesn't matter what's your vocation. God may not ask you to become a fulltime church worker. all He asks is that you trust Him in every situation you're in, this is so that people will look at you and think, "what a wonderful God you have". but, how do you do that? i have to deal with my own inferiority complex like once every week? something i read or a sudden mood change always lands me in the thought that i have no value. that i'm worthless. then my natural instinct to cheer myself up and psycho myself takes its place. i start thinking about God and how He loves me without me doing ANYTHING at all :) i know i'm loved :) i think i'll be getting a diving license. should i? i don't know. is it a waste of my life? i want to do everything for Him. i'll get to know more people :) there's commissioning tonight for the gen12ii projects. i'll be going off on a 2 week youth expedition project to china to plant trees. this is funded by national youth council, initiated by asian journeys and planned by us :) :) and we still lack people. if you are interested, please tell me :) sorry. i mostly blog when i'm down. in the times that i don't blog, i don't have the feelings i see to have when i blog. and the feelings leave me after a night's sleep. so don't worry :)

been reading "Mere Christianity" by C.S. Lewis...a truly logical book ba...for those who like to reason out everything, they would be convinced by the logic in it... a day of randomness (plus a quick update of my life) for me: #1: does everyone have a part of their own thoughts that they share with no one at all?? #2: going to earn money from helping dad do paperwork (not the typing kind of paperwork but the folding kind) #3: is there any way of knowing what the person you are talking to is thinking about??i guess you can attain this skill through much observation and analysis #4: i'm not using anymore paper bags because they are hard to make (they are what i'm currently folding) #5: people are scary.. #6: i need to say thank you to every single person in my life...do i??i know everyone has given me space to grow and taught me something but should i be thanking them or just praising God because He is so amazing?? #7: i might be going to work at polar cakes if i get the job... #8: i will master sign language and the art of driving...