on family and hurt

been reading a book on love, sex and relationship. just read this chapter on a wall of protection in the family. it said that families are the walls of protection around children so they cannot be attacked by Satan. so what happens to the child after the walls are torn down? can the child protect himself? how to?? talking about myself...triple hurts?? my brother = single hurt due to parents? me = hurt by parents + hurt by absence of my brother + hurt from... is my brother constantly not home to avoid facing the hurt in him?? help me, o lord. help me to recover from my hurts that i may start seeing relationships from Your perspective. thank you Lord, that my family is still together. but i don't know what is worse. a divorce or a cold family? one last question. what should the wife do? forgive her husband for the affair totally / protect herself from being hurt again by not loving again? even if her husband has changed, the trust is lost. so what?